I was reading Miao Anna's blog post on her daddy...which made me think back of my own dad as well...



It has been 5 years and 6 months...but it always seem like yesterday he was still around... I can still vividly picture him driving his ever ancient toyota car... reading the newspapers....disturbing me while i watched my cantonese drama infront of the couch..him sending me to classes...me being super manja and wanting things..



However, I also remember me being a pain to him...I would always throw my tantrums at him...Scold him..and always said.."I hate you" to him....I was only 14....My dad is a very religious,dedicated, loving,caring and ever so patient person...He hardly raises his voice at me....even if he did...he would always pujuk me back after that.. My dad loved playing badminton with me when i was younger...he always brought me swimming and eat a&w after that...



When i was about 12..my dad met with an accident..he broke his hand and leg...When I went to the hospital to see him...The nurses just wheleed him out from the operation room..I cried immediately upon looking at my dad...he looked so pale and in so much pain..I thought he was going to die...Mum hugged me and told me he's gonna be ok... After that incident, daddy couldn't play sports with me anymore...but he played Chess and Checkers with me everyday...and I always lost to him..



Two years later...Just about a month before my PMR...My daddy went to temple for an all night service...You see, my dad serves the temple with all his heart..He has never asked for anything in return...He is the Chairman of the Welfare Commity in the temple...as well as the Chairman for various post there... So, that day he was at the temple the whole night attending to the prayers there... The next day, in the afternoon...he came back home...he smiled at me and mum and said..he was tired..he wanted to sleep...and we will wake him up for dinner...



About an hour later...I went into the room to disturb my daddy as usual while he was sleeping...I was shocked to see my daddy turned blue...his skin was all swollen and blue...and when I went near and touched him...he was cold... I screamed out loud.. Mummy ran into the room and asked whats wrong...She saw daddy...and she screamed as well...I cried and shoke my dad...I asked him to wake up..but daddy didn't reply me.. He lied there ...stiff... My daddy was dead... Mummy panic...She screamed for my neighbour who was a nurse..She ran over and told my mum dad my dad has passed away...My mum cried and frantically called all my dad's closest friend for help..



We were lost..How could a man so healthy a couple of hours ago...just die like that?? I cried and cried... I didn't know what to do...I couldn't accept the fact that my dad has passed away...I have so many things to do with him!!! I haven't told him how much I love him...I haven't said I was sorry for misbehaving all these years.. All I can remember was I cried and cried..Anna came and accompany me for two days during my dad's wake... I cried until there were no more tears in me...



I hated the way those aunties and uncles told me..."Its alright girl..everything is going to be ok..." I was boiling with anger...How can you say its going to be alright??? My dad just passed away!!! How is everything going to be oK????



As I am writing this post...tears are trickling down my face...I miss him so much.. Daddy, you will always live in my heart...I'm sorry for all the mean words I have ever uttered to you... I love you...Forgive me....

Got tagged by my dearest aiai...



Love Quiz



Game rules:


A． People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs and replace any question they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves. Tag 8 people. Those who are tagged cannot refuse.



B． These 8 people must state who they were tagged by. You cannot tag the person who tagged you. Continue this game by sending this to 8 other people. People who are tagged will be blessed and their wishes will come true in the future.
am tagged by miah(:



1.If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?
Castrate him...Tie him up, put a porn movie for him to watch while he bleeds to death..and then hunt that b*tch and slaughter her while removing all her limbs.



2.What will you do if you do not share the same feelings as the person who likes you?
Get him to move on.



3.What will your dream wedding be like?
A garden wedding..(not some anyhow garden.it has to be a big beautiful garden) with a cupid fountain overlooking...decorated with silver and white drapes...lots of pink lilies everywhere...



4.Are you confused as to what lies ahead of you?
Sometimes...i guess life is mysterious



5.What's your ideal lover like?
He looks like my baby. =)



6.Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone else?
Both. To love and be loved.



7.If the person you like does not accept you, would you continue to wait for them to change their feelings?
I don't think so...hey, its his loss!



8.If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
In the first place, i wouldn't even fall for a attached man.



9.Is there anything that has made you unhappy recently?
Loads of it...but I don't want to mention it...



10.What do you want most in life?
Healthiness and happiness for my mum, myself and my loved ones.



11.Is being tagged fun?
Hahaha..if one is bored, yes its fun.



12.If you find out that your best friend is going out with your boyfriend/girlfriend, how would you react?
If she was my BEST FRIEND in the first place, why would she do such a thing?



13.Who is currently the most important person to you?
Lots of peoples are important to me...eg..Mum, Eric, Shyan, Anna, Yee, May, lots more



14.What kind of person do you think I am?
You mean the person who tagged me?? (Shyan)..She is the sweetest person on earth



15.What is the most unforgettable thing/event in your life?
When my dad passed away



16.If the person you secretly like cannot recognise you, what would you do/how would you react?
Starts ignoring him.



17.Would you give your all in a relationship?
Yes..if he is worth it.



18.If you fall in love with two persons simultaneously, who would you pick?
The person who loves me more.



19.What type of friends do you like?
What type of friends I like?? I like friends who are sincere, trustworthy, caring and sensible.



20.If you played a prank on someone, and he/she fell for the trick, what would you do?
LAUGH!



People whom I tag:
Anna
John Gan
Catherine
Huey Juen
*eh this people also donno got read my blog one or not..zzz...*
Pekie
Wei Xin
May Ching
Ling

OMG!!! My muscles are aching...in fact, my whole body is sore!!! Sobs... I've been going gym (Celebrity Fitness) for the past 3 days in a row with baby and Cat... first time i've ever stepped into a gym...overall, i would say it was a fun experience..especially accompanied by baby and Cat...



First day went for yoga sessions with Cat...so shy...all those aunties can bend like crazy while i only manage to do half of the "stunts"... even Cat is able to do the stunts...sniffs.. the coach say my bones too stiff.... =/ eee.....



Next day went for workout with Cat...kept laughing all the way coz we abit sua ku in using the equipments..later, went for sauna and steam bath with her....eee....so hot la inside the room...smoky...both of us are claustrophobic..(nt sure how it is spelt)..And both of us SUPER LOVE the hair dryers in Celebrity Fitness...it has very very super blow effect..and makes your hair have a nice volume...<3<3 hair dryer...



Yesterday, I went gym alone with baby coz Cat busy with work....This time, i didn't feel much pain...You know why??...Coz my body numb already..Cannot feel the pain anymore.... Muahahhaha... Dear took a fitness test...and the results were excellent.. Mine was only above average..I guess i'm not that fit....



Here are the pictures that i promised you guys...Enjoy..Have a great weekend

Happy Happy Happy Valentines!!



Just so that you know, valentines is not meant for couples only, its meant for rocking single people out there as well!



I'm amazed at how humans can be such hypocrites. *SIGHS*. Lesson number #lost count, When i try pleasing everybody, i end up pleasing none at all.



I spend Chinese New Year in the comfort of family. Great uncles, aunts, cousins, nieces, nephews, and yes, My Ever Lovely Mum. I think it beats hell out of spending time getting drunk in clubs.



I don't want to shed a tear anymore for the ever changing nature of humans. I don't want to have my heart broken anymore by being dissapointed at it, yet i keep crying.



I'm a buddhist, but yesterday night, i asked Eric to pray to God for me, I couldn't stop crying



He says, i try to hard....

[EDITED AT 10.49 PM. HOW CAN HUMANS BE SUCH HYPOCRITES?????????????]






Happy early valentine's to all of you and Happy Chinese New Year(i know its a little too late)!!!!

Lets rewind the scene back to a week before Chinese New Year, dear brought me to this high class night market somewhere in PJ to see Chinese New Year stuff and decorations...my goodness..the peach blossom flowers were sooooo beautiful.... the flowers were blossoming in a pot...on a closer look, the flowers were actually fake ones..made of lights...but it looks sooooo realllllll....seriously...



I bought a couple of t-shirts from Juicy Couture in Sunway Pyramid for Chinese New Year (just an excuse to get more shirts..)



Invited Anna (miao), John, Clayton over for early Chinese new year reunion dinner plus lou yee sang....below are the pictures..



Celebrated anniversary with dear at Chilli's Midvalley, followed by the movie CJ7...quite entertaining movie..abit touching as well...Dear bought a couple ring for both of us and carved our names into the ring =) <3<3 .. Thanks dear...



Will post the pictures tommorow

I'm sick.zzz



I have Obsessive Compulsive disorder and also Obsessive Compulsive Personality disorder...Both are different sickness and i suffer from both of them. Sobs



Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is a psychiatric anxiety disorder most commonly characterized by a subject's obsessive, distressing, intrusive thoughts and related compulsions (tasks or "rituals") which attempt to neutralize the obsessions.




Obsessive compulsive personality disorder (OCPD), or anankastic personality disorder, is a personality disorder that is characterized by a general psychological inflexibility, rigid conformity to rules and procedures, perfectionism, moral code, and/or excessive orderliness.



Eric and I have the same obsessive compulsive disorder whereby both of us have the same obsession to lock our cars multiple times. We would lock our car's once and keep unlocking and locking it back until we are "satisfied" we have locked our car doors.



On the other hand, i have an obsessive compulsive personality disorder whereby i am a perfectionism. I love to clean the house till it is spotless,without a single strand of hair on the floor. I can't stand it if i have cleaned the house and i find a strand of hair on the floor. I would imediately either a) clean the house again b) start picking up those hairs.



Had early chinese new year reunion dinner yesterday with baby, Anna, Jon and Clayts. Later was joined by baby's bro and sister in law. =) I love playing bluff with them.hehe.. i alwiz win~ Its not because i am a good liar...its just that you all not "pro" enuff for the game. Muahahhhahaha



Shall update pics later. I have to go to school now. See ya

Ever felt like you are being loaded with 100kg of bricks? I'm feeling that right now... zzz... I have tones of assignments in my hands... suffocating ah!!!



Went to Clayton's place yesterday night for bbq...had fun..met alot of new people =) Thanks clayton.



Having Chinese New Year dinner tommorow with John, Clayton , Anna , baby and I.. =) Hope i cook well enough...

The Law of the Seed...



Take a look at an apple tree.

There might be five hundred apples on the tree, but each apple has

just
ten seeds.

That's a lot of seeds!



We might ask,

"Why would you need so many seeds to grow just a few more apple
trees?"

Nature has something to teach us here.

It's telling us:

"Not all seeds grow. In life, most seeds never grow".



So if you really want to make something happen, you had better try
more
than once."



This might mean:


You'll attend twenty interviews to get one job.

You'll interview forty people to find one good employee.

You'll talk to fifty people to sell one house, one car, one vacuum
cleaner,

one insurance policy, or a business idea.

And you might meet a hundred acquaintances

just to find one special friend.



When we understand the "Law of the Seed",

we don't get so disappointed.

We stop feeling like victims.

We learn how to deal with things that happen to us.




Laws of nature are not things to take personally.

We just need to understand them - and work with them.




IN A NUTSHELL



Successful people fail more often. But they plant more seeds.



When Things Are Beyond your control,

here's something that you must NOT DO so as to

avoid misery in your life:



You must not decide how you think the world SHOULD be.

You must not make rules for how everyone SHOULD behave.

Then, when the world doesn't obey your rules, you get angry!

That's what miserable people do!



On the other hand, let's say you expect that:


Friends SHOULD return favours.

People SHOULD appreciate you.

Planes SHOULD arrive on time.

Everyone SHOULD be honest.

Your husband or best friend SHOULD remember your birthday.



These expectations may sound reasonable.

But often, these things won't happen!

So you end up frustrated and disappointed.




There's a better strategy. Demand less, and instead, have
preferences!



For things that are beyond your control, tell yourself:
"I WOULD PREFER "A", BUT IF "B" HAPPENS, IT'S OK TOO!"



This is really a change in mindset.

It is a shift in attitude, and it gives you more peace of mind ...



You prefer that people are polite .... but when they are rude, it
doesn't

ruin your day.

You prefer sunshine ... but if it rains, it is ok too!



To become happier, we either need to


a) Change the world, or

b) Change our thinking.



It is easier to change our Thinking!



IN A NUTSHELL



It is not the problem that is the issue, but rather it is your
attitude

attending

to the issue that is the problem.



It's not what happens to you that determine your happiness.

It's how you think about what happens to you!